Do you learn and change from everything that happens to you? Good and bad, simple and complicated? Do you reflect & immerse yourself, or do you cooly move on? So many questions before I even say…
I am throwing a lovely sunny, warm-morning tea party. Let’s enjoy ourselves and chat, shall we? Okay then…
Often, while driving in my car, down the highway, the Santa Catalina Mountains, beautiful and hovering, I think about how I am constantly learning and growing. Changing, and reflecting.
I don’t like complications in my life. I don’t like ill will. I don’t like grudges and negativity. Does anyone? I live in my own little world. I protect my heart and myself. I learned in my late teens, how I don’t like to feel and situations I don’t want to be in. I went through all the waves of angst and such. It took many years in my twenties to master avoiding such spaces (not fully mastered yet, but worlds better).
You know those spaces right? Such as, not being respected by someone you give your heart to. Or, having mean friends who fill your head with gunk. Who want to see you fail. Who are never happy for you. Ugh, I think most of us have felt some of that in some way. So, hopefully, you learn to see the signs, and remove such things from your life.
Sometimes, you have to get burned, many many times, to find your way. I know I have. And, probably still will. Only now, I will detect it sooner and move away from it…
I have also learned though, the sweetness of life is not what I thought it was. The sweetness of life is all around us, at every moment. It is not miles away, at some place we have to strive to get to, through jobs and money, through relationships and places.
It sits safe and sound, within our hearts. In our little souls. Waiting for us to see it. To feel it. To grasp our own slices of it. It even sits in precious memories, ones from the past and ones to be made…
Where am I going with this? Well, I tell ya, just when I least expect, I keep learning and growing. Lessons a plenty. I think the biggest lesson in my life now, after love and a sense of inner peace, is letting go & loss.
I am not good with those things, as I am sure most of us are not. Loss of the ones I love (the most difficult), loss of material possessions, loss of control…
Over the years, I have been forced, kicking and screaming, to lose control. Control of what? Control of life. Control of random things that happen (like computers and bursting water pipes). There are just some things you can’t control. And, you know what? There is nothing you can do about it. Nothing. And better yet, it is okay. And, there will be some way to resolve any matter. Maybe not how you wanted it to go, but still, some way…
Now, you might not understand my issue with the loss of control thing. Not to the extent I am describing. You see, I am the oldest child, raised from day one, to speak up, speak loud. Be assertive, be strong. Be in control of your surroundings. Make your path, make your own destiny. And, I will say, all of that is great, but I think I took it too seriously. In my mostly, type A personality way. If you know what I mean?
What type personality are you?
You know, the fact of the matter is, you really are not in control of anything. Even though you think you are. And, things happen, there are hiccups, and there is nothing you can do to prevent some of them. But, most importantly, it is okay. Things can be remedied. And, even though, you have to react to things at first, which may be BY kicking and screaming in a grocery store parking lot 😉 You have to take a deep breath afterwards. And, as Mombie says, compartmentalize.
I am "learning" to take deep breaths. To walk away from things and come back to them later. I am not very good at that. I want immediate results, I want things to begin the resolving process "immediately if not sooner" (I got that from my dad).
I put myself on unnecessary schedules. I am my own dictator regime. Yet over the last couple of years, I have been letting up. And you know what? It feels sooooo good.
Last March I took somewhat of a break from my very own dictatorship and hectic business life. It has been an amazing year. And, the little curve balls thrown my way are helping me. They truly are. Annoying as they may be, they are creating a patience in me I never had. Ever.
And, they are making me love life even more. I love sitting outside, sipping tea or coffee, feeling the breeze on my face, closing my eyes. And tapping into the swell of memories and thoughts in my heart. I shed happy tears, and sometimes nostalgic ones.
And, you know what, everything is just fine… I feel the butterflies fluttering in me, when I think of how lucky I am, to be living here, safe and sound, and a free person. Compared to everything happening all over the world that is bad, nothing is wrong… Nothing.
This afternoon, I was listening to NPR, and this show came on. Try to listen to it if you can, it was good. It touched me just at that moment. You know how that can happen sometimes?
The song they played (does it bring up any memories in you?), reminded me of being at the carnival as a young young girl, with my Aunt Denise and her friends. It also reminded me of my uncles with their huge frizzy 1970’s hair. It reminded me of being at the river on Easter as a young kid. With my uncles, aunts, cousins and parents. Listening to 60’s and 70’s music. Lots of music, all the time. And lots of music talk. They would sit around, reflecting, chatting. Us kids (me and my cousins) would be pretending we were mermaids in the river water. Having the time of our lives. Eating watermelon…
Life was less complicated… Or so it seems, as I relive the moments in some of my heart of hearts most beloved childhood memories.
My siblings and I grew up in totally different worlds. Technology had not taken over back then. It was barely creeping in. And, today, the river of my childhood memories has been condemned as being polluted. I shake my head in disbelief…
Those times were so good… They remind me of how I had no cares in the world.
Things were fresh and alive. But wait, they still are. Only different… It is all a matter of perception. I am sure, I will reflect on today in 25 years, with the same love and nostalgia… And, I will probably still be learning…
But for now, I remind myself and remind you, that you are wonderful. You have the sweetness of life inside of you. Noone can take that away, unless you willingly give it up…
We should say… I affirm, that I will paint my world with color. I will continue to create. I will take deep breaths…
I will love and cherish, and take care of me. I am the only person on earth, who can make that promise to me, and mean it…
There you have it. Lots of thoughts… On this sunny bright warm day…
See you soon!! Love, V
(I am profoundly thankful for having exceptional parents who swoop in and are there for me for anything, like angels, without me even having to ask. Amazing. Mombie reads this, so thank you more than words can express, for the tremendous love, Mom and Dad.)
Miss Vanessa, you have no idea how closely I relate to every single word you’ve written. And in the interest of keeping this short(ish), I just want to say that I have *finally* gotten to the calmer, more peaceful place you are in today….it just took me 10 years longer than you to get there! One of the reasons for that is exactly what you said about the people in our lives.
There was a time when I thought the end of a very long marriage was the most devastating thing that had ever happened to me. It turned out it was the beginning of a whole new life for me. A life free from MAJOR “gunk”! 😉
As a Type B personality I crave simplicity, I do stop and smell the flowers, and I truly have no room in my life for mean people. Life it too short.
So here is to “the sweetness of life”…may we all be fortunate to find it for ourselves. And to you Miss Vanessa for a beautifully written post that I am now going to print out as it is truly inspiring.
Hola preciosa! A beautiful, wise and thoughtful post. From one oldest child to another, I know EXACTLY what you mean! Yes, it’s hard letting go and giving up control, but it is essential. As always, you are inspiring and warm and wonderful and I am so looking forward to having tea together later this year! Happy Easter to you, Mr. Lovee and all the family (and say Hi to your talented and charming composer/musician brother and will you please send me Strange Beautiful Lady’s CD?) 🙂 Lots of love from Paris, Tara xoxox
What a wonderful post! As a mother I have been in many situtions of which I had no control and at first in was hard but now I just laugh it off. I also stay away from confrontation and dislike drama. I now surround myself only with people who feed my soul, people I would like to learn from, people who are genuinely happy for me. I have had to let go of certain friendships that were hazardous to my mental health and it was very hard. Life is short so I try very hard to make it enjoyable and to be happy every day. Your tea party pix are wonderful! Sandyxox
Such a lovely post, lovely words and photos! You are absolutely right, life is so much better if we just relax. I am an oldest child too. I think it makes not just a bit opinionated, but we so have that need to make everyone okay. That is one I have had to work on, have to say moving away has helped that one whether I like it or not! Have a lovely Easter, you have the good chocolate I see, Bravo! XOXO
Vanessa,
What a wonderful post. Your pictures and words are certainly uplifting. I’ll bet you didn’t know you would be so inspirational to so many people.
Wow, did this entry resonate w/me being the oldest girl of three. I too was taught to speak up, probably by default. I have an older brother … 1 year and 2 days older… but let’s just say he had the unfortunate luck to have Little Miss Bossy Pants as his younger sister. I do love what Michelle said above me there… that we have to make sure everyone is ok as the oldest. That is all too true. Oh, well, I could go on and on with this reflection. Loved the entry! I’ll have to go listen to that NPR segment.
I am subscribed to Google Reader and this evening up came your last two posts…a little late, I would say.
I had no idea about all the problems you were having with your computer…so sorry to hear that.
I am happy to hear that you have resolved them albeit that you had to start fresh…sometimes that is the best way.
I love this post and enjoyed the tea and chat tremendously…you are such a wise and wonderful person and a good example to your readers.
I wish you and your family a very Happy Easter.
I really needed to read that exact post at this exact time.
Happy Easter!
Such a lovely post Vanessa. You are such a dear soul and I could relate too…even though I’m a younger sister to an older, controlling brother…LOL
I am always touched by your posts and like you, have parents that have always been my anchors as well as my life boats. We are both blessed.
Peace and love and the happiest of Easters to you and yours…
Hey, I am the oldest child too! What a coinky-dink.
Miss Vanessa, sometimes it hits the fan and we are standing in front of the fan and it hits us in the face.
“IT” happens!!! LOL
I hope you know you are a cherished blog friend and anyone who doesn’t want to see you succeed has ISSUES. Glad you are letting it roll off like water off a duckie.
Much happiness & bliss & chockies to you this Easter, to Caroline and Eunice too missy!
xoxoxo
Gillian
smooches!
I loved this post Miss Vanessa. I have a lot to learn from it. I am a total stress case and I hate being a stress case. I am a big worrier and I hate that too.
I need to remember all the beautiful things and be grateful for them and just be happy. I try. It just doesn’t always work.
But, it’s always nice to visit here and see all the fun, pretty things going on… all the creativity. Thanks for the tea party..
VV- You know how I feel about everything you wrote. Letting go is the best revenge against all those negatives that enter your life. Mishaps, misfriends, etc. We can only control what we do…or don’t do. And you’re right- it is an on-going lesson.
You said it beautifully.
Now what’s with those delicious photos? Talk about control! I’m trying to stop myself from driving to an all-night bakery.
XO- You’re the best!
D.
PS- Thank you to your mom and dad, too!
Beautiful, beautiful post! Your words really spoke to my heart just when I needed it – thank you, thank you! Have a very blessed Easter!
It seems I go in and out of calmness. I’m an only child and struggle with many of the same things you write of. Your blog is beautiful and enriching. I’m not sure what direction I took to get here…but I’m glad the door was open.
Oh I’m such a worrier and find it hard to accept that there are many things I can’t control and therefore shouldn’t get stressed about (late trains, burst water pipes and traffic to name but a few). I’m slowly getting the hang of it but it’s taking time. I’m an eldest child too!
Happy Easter from Fairytale Ipswich x
I am invisioning that you & I are huddled together engrossed in a conversation – time stands still, the sun is out – or it’s raining (it doesn’t really matter, does it?) – and you & I are on the same page…I love that about reading your blog – you share my thoughts…then we realize the time and you & I go on our way until we visit again.
Happy Easter! 🙂
What we experience each moment in life is the experience we need …to learn from. good and bad. Ihave learned not to worry..cause everything works out . Finally in my life I have learned to be at one with the moment…not always easy! Just this morning I sat on the beach and felt the warmth of the early sun and smell of the salty air. I felt so peaceful and perfect. . Vanessa..I love coming to your blog.You are an enchanting gal wth an incredibly sweet soul. I know you are having a happy Easter ’cause I see some fine looking chocolat!!!!!! Love and blessings to you and your family!
“Everything is pink and perfect.”
I love that.
Oh, I just love this post. It does resonate with me so much. I remind my self daily that I can just let go and walk my own path. And I do. Your words meant so much to me today. You are an amazing gal too!!
Happy Easter
xoxo Lisa
Happy Easter V
http://notesfromthetree.wordpress.com/2008/03/23/on-easter-sunday/
-Ben
Beautiful post, Vanessa. Sweetness from God – the only kind that lasts, that can bring us through difficult things, that causes springs of joy! Happy Easter. Blessings… Polly
Oh Miss Fanciful! What a lovely post, I was smiling as I listened to the Youngbloods thinking of all the other bloggy friends listening and smiling too….
Like dear spf Easter music says….Life’s been good to me, I’ve had an excellent time so far!
happy Easter to you!
x…x
Such an inspirational post! So much to contemplate on. It’s nice you’ve been learning that sooner than later. Can you imagine, some people take a life time to begin looking at those things.
Oh V…this is exactly what I needed to read, however did you know? I too am a first born, and we are different…driven, which does come with a bit of control issues. I JUST read about Control in a book, and the effective ways of relaxing and realizing that although we effect the world, we are a small pebble in the pond and it’s OK to relax and welcome the chaos in the nature of it all…which is just perfect as we had the most delightful tea party with you today. And as for recognizing things earlier in life? THAT must be why we have gone through so much in our lives, to help us have the tools to bring to us what we really want…I would like to say, and keep what we want, but often, the things we have are on loan aren’t they?
Have a beautiful Easter and a wonderful spring celebration of the renewal of you…You are a delightful and wise woman who spreads so much joy and beauty. Thank you, as always, for sharing your Fanciful Twist.
Happy Easter!!!
Life is filled with days we can’t control… mine seem to be much more frequent now. I miss the innocence of childhood but do treasure and value all that I have seen, touched, loved- experienced.
From one type A to another- cherish your day, sip your tea, and empower yourself. And my gosh eat lots of those lovely treats!!!
What a lovely read for this Easter Sunday. Thank you again for the time and thought you put into your entries. Once again I can relate. Life will always be a work in progress but it is nice to feel like you have unloaded some unnecessary junk.
You are wise beyond words and such an incredibly gentle soul!! This is an absolutely beautiful post!! I totally agree with your philosophy. I try to learn from life’s lessons and look at everything in a way that will help me to become a better person. I don’t always hit the mark but I’m definitely trying as I move along my life’s path. Thank you so much for sharing your beautiful words and lovely heart with us. Happy Easter to you, sweet girl!
Beautiful post VV. The thing that touched me the most is your bringing up that we have to take control and responsibility for our own actions, not just only for how we treat people, but how we allow them to effect us.
Many happy wishes to you and Mr. Lovee on the Easter Holiday.
xox
Constance
More “KICK THE CAN” and less emotional vampires. Just yesterday I was talking with a good friend of childhood days of playing kick the can, hide and go seek and marco polo. We need to have more of “that” feeling in our lives. The good news, we can because we are in control. It took me so many years to walk the talk, but I am a new person because of it. I also have had to break ties with people who want to be my friends for all the wrong reasons and drain all my positive energy. It is hard to make to break but the results are plentiful.
Enjoy your new freedom and thank you for a very unexpected Easter gift.
Letting go of control? Oh yes, know that one! “I am my own dictator regime”…oh, so well put! Vanessa, thanks for the Easter brunch and chat…and some wonderful memories with the Youngbloods. I so enjoyed my visit with you.
Lovely post, Vanessa! We do need to capture moments…music really does enhance and revive memories. “Let’s Get Together” was popular when I was a young woman in Berkeley – much going on and actually quite a splendid time. Today I captured the moment listening to some jazz while cleaning the patio furniture with the scent of my freesias making this day special…sounds mundane, but the day was lovely.
OK girlfriend – I’m here and sending you this test. Can’t wait to go back and read your blog – will do that a little later. Hugs!
hello girly girl- i love you top ( cloths ) is it a dress- anyway i hope you have a fantastic easter- singing and skipping love jo anderson.
Have a wonderful Easter Sunday!
blessings,
kari & kijsa
Hope it was wonderful!!
D.
We are born alone and die alone………
Yes WE can only take care of us and control as much as we possibly can how we paint our masterpiece.
I love that song by the YoungBloods.
Love you
Jeanne
Fabulous post!!!!!Its nice to know there is someone else out there who doesnt view their world as one drama after the other. Your tea pics are awesome, and oh yeah..that little piggy is just TOO CUTE!
Your posts are always so beautiful! I know just what you mean….I’ve been thinking of that seemingly lost simplicity of my childhood years as of late,too….I’ve been trying to capture it again….perhaps I should not try to hard…and see if it lands on my outstretched fingers…by chance! 🙂
Your Easter pretties are so delightful!
Thanks for sharing your lovely world! 🙂
Happy Easter Preciosa!
This is an absolutely marvellous pos. Your honesty and self-reflection on your journey are inspiring. I love the pictures with which you illustrate, too. Today, I’m reflecting on an important question, and would welcome your input.
Ooops… no way to edit that comment! meant “marvellous POST”, of course!
Constantly learning, growing, reflecting and changing…even that is inspiring and not easy to achieve. I am learning to let go, but need more discipline for a little more ‘control’ in life. I love your optimistic attitude and zest for life, so much for me to learn. Bravo to your parents for teaching so much.
It’s easy to forget how fortunate we are. I try to remind myself every single day.
I learned a lot, long ago, from D H Lawrence’s mother! Truly. Apparently she told him (use a northern English accent for this): ‘If you don’t like it, change it. If you can’t change it, lump it.’
This helps, especially when I’m grieving over something out of my control.
Lovely wise words from you too. Thank you!
Thank you for that post, I am finally learning to breathe and ease up on myself, so your post really hits close to home.
Ah, Beautiful and completely get it!
Yes, to always learning, yes, to doing our best, yes to love and yes, to painting our worlds with color!
Sigh…
Xo
Sandra Evertson
this happens a lot, i come to your blog and you have written EXACTLY what i need to hear.
thank you for putting into words the experiences so many of us have, and the lessons we can all benefit from learning through time. it’s a bit like eating healthily and excercising, we so often know in our heads what we should be doing, what is best for our bodies, our cells, our muscles and ultimately our well being as a whole… but it always helps to be reminded as we slip into bad habits or choose to forget what is less than easy. And there are always new things to be learned that make the path more varied and interesting. The same is true of our emotional wellbeing and today, exactly when i needed it (my holiday was great but has thrown up a LOT of childhood related trauma) you have written in a way that speaks directly to the way i need to be thinking so i don’t fall into a gloom now thta i have returned to my ‘real’ life. thank you thank you thank you vanessa, truly.
and on a purely light fluffy superficial level, it’s just a total delight to see all those sunny images of tea and sweet things… i have partaken of some easter choc from Mr P as I read this so I have joined you from afar, from a snowy place, bitterly cold, but with lots of moments of incredibly bright sunshine through the day that have the same effect as your bright and beautiful blog space. lots of love to you madame, may your year have more moisture and cool breezes than last year, and may mine have less :0) xxx
Psssst Vanessa, I am not meant to be reading blogs (blog vacation and all) and at the very least not commenting, but OH VANESSA! I know, I know, I know. I know exactly what you mean. Control, oh yeah, know that one. Negativity, have been learning to say no to those people. So anyway, this is one of those – had to respond to posts. Take care sweet thing. Wishing you much sumptuous color and scrumptious treats!!!
And by the way those little bristle brush animals are adorable.
Hi Vanessa,
That was a wonderful post. Thank God for my 30s. These years have been great. My 20s were full of learning about how not to be a perfectionist. Being a working, student, mother will teach you that you have to let some things slide a little. And compartmentalizing is great advise. It is so easy to be overwhelmed if you don’t. My mother always tells me that very thing. I also have learned a ton about controlling behaviors and how not to control or be controlled by people or events. It sounds like you have been working on the same types of things. Once you get a hold of those concepts, they are so valuable. Thank you for sharing this.
-Kandes-
We sound so very much alike! If you haven’t read it – I highly recommend Oprah’s book club pick – A New Earth. It has really helped me to calm down and view things in a new way.
Karla
Ah yes, growing up brings with it sweetness as we learn to let go of some things, ignore others, treasure what is most important and cling tight to things we used to take for granted.
Blessings to you, my dearest!
xoxo
Melissa
First of all, I love the yellow teacup.
Secondly, great post. I know what you mean about stepping back, taking a deep breath and SLOWING DOWN. I always tended to rush about, getting stressed in the process, but I had a bit of an epiphany a year or two ago (too long and mundane to describe) which has made me slow down in the little things that just don’t matter, like running for a bus when the next one will be along in ten minutes. Why cause that sort of stress? Why get yourself into a lather over the small things?
Such a fantastic post. I was biding my time waiting for my lovely mermaid print to reach me from your etsy shop and decided to check out the person behind the print. I am so glad I did! I wonder what you were thinking when you were creating the beautiful mermaid in the sea…ha!
Ahhhh, the Youngbloods, my most played album! My younger sisters (3 of them) would sneek into my bedroom and listen to all my albums when I wasn’t there. I never knew this until a couple of years ago. I have the album on my iPod with one of the songs playing and my sister was over and told me ..ha
My daughter (now 29) had a friend since kindergarten that had a knack for always bringing my daughter down. Even though I told her many many times that she did not need a person like that in her life she still kept her as a friend because she felt sorry for her. It took 20 years before my daughter finally cut the tie to that “friend”. She later told me it was the best thing she ever did.
Let’s see, what else…hmmm I am a control freak. I like to be in control, be organized, have things in their place in my home. If you move something, you better put it back where it belongs!
I learned long ago that there are some things, ok, many things, that can’t be controlled (my son was one of those) I had to learn the hard way, that no matter how hard I tried to be a good parent, how many books I read on how to raise children (problem children, that is), that nothing worked and I had no control over my son. I had to finally raise up my hands and throw in the towel and hope for the best. Maybe something I said would finally sink in.
Now I can’t wait till my mermaid gets here and I will think of you whenever I look at her. She will be in my beach/sea/shore inspired dining room. She will have some other mermaids friends there waiting for her to arrive. When the lights are out, they will gather and tell each other stories.
I think every oldest child is type A. Moi aussi. There were expectations placed on us by “new” parents, and then the expectations that we placed on ourselves. I watch my oldest and keep a check on him that he is not doing this to himself…he does to some degree and I remind him frequently to be kind to himself — to be gentle.
Of course I remember this song — and it brought back some very happy memories. And it made me think and reflect.
So did your post — losing control, giving up control, accepting life for what it is. I learned that the hard way sadly, and yet, it has been one of the best lessons of my life for which I am forever and eternally grateful.
Much love to you — your spirit is immense and becomes part of everything you say, do, create and touch. xo
Warning, this may be book-like 🙂 Let’s hope it makes sense, it was kind of stream-of-consciousness 🙂
There’s this quote from a song by Derek Webb that I love – it goes “What would you do if someone put a gun to your head, and asked you to tell them a lie? What would you say if you were pushed that way, to betray yourself to keep yourself alive? Is life worth so much? There’s got to be a love that’s stronger than our fear of everything being out of control…”
To me this has a lot to do with our relationship with ourselves – how we see ourselves – I believe that Derek Webb is talking specifically of a love of God, but similarly to how Kierkegaard talks about the critical relationships being our relationship to God and our relationship to ourself, that they are inextricably linked and tied together.
So, it makes me think about myself and how I view myself, and whether my relationship with myself is deep and strong enough that I don’t feel threatened by circumstances.
Love is something that makes us feel that we belong, it helps us to discover who we are and makes us feel safe in that process. It ‘names’ us in a sense (to borrow from Madeline L’Engle). It helps us have a safe environment to grow strong roots and for that reason, it casts out fear. This is tied to other people as well, as they play a huge role in your environment, but also it is tied to yourself and how you see yourself. If you love yourself rightly, you will not fear change or loss or whatever, because even though it might hurt, you know that it does not change who you are, it does not threaten your *real* you, it does not make you less or more, it simply is, and you can engage it and feel it and process it and then you can keep moving, because you know that you are who you are and that is good.
It also reminds me of a quote from Antoine de Saint-Exupery (who wrote the little prince), talking about the development of the airplane (he was a mail pilot), and how it had gotten more and more minimalist as time went on, and he made the comment that a thing has reached perfection, not when there was nothing left to add, but when there was nothing left to take away. That hit me really hard – we have to be stripped of whatever is not essentially us.
Anyway, most of the time we only really learn this by experiencing ourselves, which hurts, but helps us to become. And it’s important, because then we can love others more rightly, help lift them up as they go through these things, and help them endure and understand the pruning process.
So, go and fly, achieve your dreams and make life beautiful. Everything is connected.
I really enjoyed your post. It was thought provoking and enhancing if you get what I mean. I’ve been thinking about some of those very things lately. I guess as you get older, you look back and learn and have the courage to make the best choices for who you are in truth and to be that truth because you have every right to be.
Hugs,
Dy
I have a total control issue…
I am learning and trying to accept that there are so many things that I have no control over. But still I worry. YOu are so smart to acknowledge this.
Your parents must be so proud of you. YOu are really an amazing person.
ahh Vanessa, you have gone into subjects that reflect my life allot. I am an A type personality and have been in many situations where friends are not there for you but there to try and bring you down and want you to fail.
I sometimes feel that its inevitable when you have friends who do similar work or who are creative. There are those who are happy for your success and those who wish you no success so they can be more successful.
I have gotten rid of all the bad baggage or poison friends in my life and now its just me and all my stuff.
I do not know if you are at a crossroads but I find this year my world has been turned upside down and now I have to figure out what is my next plan in life.
I am hoping the next phase of my life will be less stressful and more full of fun, unexpected events. I think no one has control and if you think you have it all under control, look out life will throw you a curve ball.
So yes, take a deep breath and enjoy the little pleasures I know I am trying so I guess we will have to do it together!!
By the way the best way I calm down is to workout!! I find running almost like therapy, now if I could just stop eating so I can really loose the weight then we are talking!!
rock on Vanessa, you do it so well!
xo Ellen
I love your blog so much. I’m always checking to see what you have for inspiration. I’m 12 and I’ve had a beaded jewelry business for 2 years now. I just started a page on ETSY and a blog about myself and my work. I’m always telling my parents that I want my blog to be like yours. You inspire me. Cambria
P.S. I’m adding you to my favorites list on my blog!! Cambria
I think what I love about your blog is my appreciation for all the positive and creative energy that you have. I truly enjoy how you illustrate your moods with images and artwork.
To me every day is just like a play, and we can dress it up with happiness and change our mind when it wants to think about unpleasant things. I can tell you have good control over your mind and keep it focussed on the beauty around you.
Sometimes when I get hurt my ability to control my surroundings sends me in a tizzy. But soon in just a little bit of time I am able to regain my composure and go back to life as I want it to be. You are such an inspiration, and I am so glad that you have parents that can keep you safe.
Blessings, Karen
Thank you for a lovely tea and a timely topic. I stopped by twice since I didn’t have enough the first time. I’m also the oldest and still struggle with my “control issues” every day. I know that life is better when I can relax and I continue to learn what works in my life to allow for loosening my reigns on life. Anyways, thanks for sharing.
First of all, let me say, that tea party looks fantastic and I am more than willing to pull up a chair!
Second, let me say that your words touched my soul! Especially the part about having friends who fill you life with gunk and want to see you fail. Someone very very dear to me has become one of those people and it hurts daily. It has affected me every day for the last year and every time I feel success… I am made to feel awful again. I want so much to move on, and lose the toxic people who make my soul feel poisoned. This post is going to be the kick in the pants that I have been needing. Thank you, Vanessa!!
I’ve been enjoying a scroll through your blog… love the ladies in their paper dresses…. amazing creations….
this stuff about little things being important…it’s so true.. and yet…how many people there are, forever bemoaning their fate..wanting more..not even seeing what surrounds them…. sad isn’t it?…..they just don’t get it. As you say, we are sooo lucky to live where we do and have all that we have…. my husband and I often sit down to supper and click our glasses and say…how luck are we? It can often bring a tear to our eyes….
Nostalgic post, Vanessa
Just thought I’d peruse some of your old posts with your wisdom for the moment.
Me? I am a type B personality and married a type A OCD, man. He has a lot of wonderful qualities, but when that OCD comes into play, I can’t change him in any way what-so-ever. Of course, I’m not perfect, and hope I never consider myself to be perfect or better than other people. Of course we all do have choices on how we will react to arguments, and sometimes, to protect yourself one has to be truthful of how any situation appears to be, even if the one who doesn’t see it ‘your way’ will never ‘get it.’ My hubby also has a panic disorder when he cannot be in control of a situation that is out of his hands. I have had to tell him he is out of control and walk out of the room. Not fun, and not easy to deal with. But, sometimes I catch myself doing the same thing, fuming in front of my kids. Yup, we all live and learn. Otherwise we will be biting our nails trying to change people for the rest of our lives and it will just wear us out, when there is really nothing we can do about it. I try to go with the flow, and learn from comments my middle son says to me when he doesn’t want to listen to my fuming when things don’t seam fair (he is so much like his dad, but with a sense of fairness attached to what he says). My children have taught me much.
I am content with little in life, but I have been blessed with much! Too much, in fact, so I am rather spoiled as far a possessions go. I’d rather be spoiled with love, and kindness, and peace, and joy..those go a long way to having a content life.
I know this is a very old post of yours, but wanted to make a comment anyway.
hugs,
Miss Teresa